Glamatron

Okay, we all know that Brittney Spears officially lost it not when she flashed her poor shorn pudenda (with one ugly little Ceasarean scar), but when she showed off her poor shorn head.

Now my first jaded thought (and I am jaded because I was a small child at some Haight-Ashbury fair when I saw people voluntarily shaving their heads–a Synanon thing, maybe, and some that totally creeped me out at the time, but we’re talking wayyyy, wayyy long time ago.  Obviously.  Unfortunately.) is that the hairless head look is bad if you have a short neck and big shoulders.  If I ever need chemo, I will collect turbans and pull the focus upwards.  And they won’t be greige.

Anyway, after my first thought–which is the less hair you have, the slimmer longer neck and more elfin features you need–my second thought is why is shaving her head consideried Brittney’s over-the-top bit of lunacy.  After all, here’s a woman who probably can’t even remember her natural hair color–except for a few pregnancy roots–and spent her adolescence being processed and squooshed into some middle-aged guy’s schoolgirl wet dream.  I mean, was any of it a genuine expression of whatever inner self poor Ms. Spears possesses?  Nah.

Like it or loathe it–and, yeah, it doesn’t work aesthetically–Brittney bald isn’t pretty, but it’s real.  And in some weird way it may be her first act of sanity.  A rage against the fantasy.